Thursday, April 24, 2008

Pleasantly Surprised

So I met this guy [Gerry] a few weeks ago online. Yes, it was online and YES it was on ManHunt and YES I know ManHunt is considered a hook-up site, but I have been on it for some time now and I have yet to hook-up from it. So the following is a true testament to actually being able to find friends on it too.

So this guy starts hitting me up on MH and that night we talked quite a while and he mentioned he was going out with some of his friends for a drink. I went to his house to meet his roommates (two lesbians) then we went downtown to this bar called Pub 500, which is owned by a guy and his lesbian sister. Now, this establishment is one of only two "friendly" places in here in Kato. So that night I meet a few of his friends and I had a beer and went home. It was a great night and I met some great people.

Then the following week, I met everyone at the Pub again and actually met a couple more people. So apparently everyone likes to go out on Wednesday in Kato. Well...the NEXT Wednesday there was an annual drag show at the college, MNSU. Now…taking into consideration as to where I was at [Mankato] I didn’t really have very high hopes for this show. Before we [Gerry, John, Taylor, Amber, Ryan, and myself] I was thinking there would be just a few people….maybe like 25 30 people, right? OHHH no no no....this place was packed and it was the size of a college gym. There had to be 1000 people there. Apparently, last year there were approximately 900 people too. It was awesome! I was feeling a bit more at home, or like I was not just in some hick town.

The show was great and lasted about 2 hours. After the show we all decided we would go downtown for a drink. At this time it was 10pm. Ryan, who I just met this night, and I were on the same page and were like....man...it is a “school night” so we will only go for one. Well we all go and just as we are finishing our one drink about 30 other homos walk in, including the drag queens. I don't have a problem with it, in fact I thought it was great. I will admit I was a little nervous for all of us, but OMG I had a great time and met a ton more people. Ryan and I are both on approximately our 5th beer by this time and it is midnight when the queens decide to go to this bar called "choppers." Now, let’s take the name of the bar into consideration here….”Choppers” sounds far opposite from a martini bar, right?

Well we are…almost sounds like a bad joke…about 20-30 homos walk into this bar and I bet 75% of the heads turned. You should have seen it…especially when the queens walk in!!!! It was AWESOME! Yet, I was thinking....”OHHHHHH boy!” as I am not sure what to think yet. Well, we continued to have a drink and then the queen of the queens (Gosh Alice Jones, from Minneapolis –works at the 90’s) decides to go do karaoke. And who does she decide to sing? Well, none other than Cher, of course!! So she is up there singing and I continue to check out the crowd and it is kind of sad really....you see the regulars just looking, then looking at all us homos, then shaking their heads, rolling their eyes and you know...the usual "I can't believe these fags are here” kind of a thing. I felt horrible for all of us, but ultimately...I think that was the goal or big picture view of Gosh's...I mean, maybe this was good? Maybe it was good in that yeah, we got them talking? Maybe it was “putting ourselves out there for ridicule,” but maybe it also was a way to prove that hey...we ARE here, we are not bothering you and we just want to have fun too. You know?

The point is, there are more homos here than I thought. More than anyone thinks. People are blind. We are everywhere. But the sad thing is, unlike in Minneapolis, here we feel as though we can’t be ourselves. I will admit that I met a couple guys out the other nights I went out with John and Gerry and I didn’t know they were homos. Either I have a really bad gay-dar or they are just really good at blending in here. I will be honest, I thought the group (Gerry, John, Taylor, and Ryan) I was hanging out with was it! However, now I know that when there is a gay event like that, we all come out for the support. We ARE here, but it is kind of sad in that we kind of keep to ourselves unless there is such an event.

So anyway, that night about 1:30 we all decided to head over to the dance club (the Haze). Again I had a great time! I hung out for a little while until I am finally like, “damn it is time to go since I have to work tomorrow.” However, I had ridden with Gerry since he picked me up to go to the show. It is now 2 am and I have 3 freakin dollars left so I decide to walk home!

I live about a mile away up this long hill. I thought...well it is not far, I can do this. I start walking and about halfway up the hill there are not ANY lights for about 1/4 mile and get this shit...there are woods on either side of the road so it is creepy as fuck!! I hear shit running around in the woods and am scared shitless. Of course, it was probably only a freaking squirrel or rabbit, but I am a bit nervous! I walk faster, but about 2:30am I arrive home. At this time I am like, “fuck I gotta be up in a few hours. I cannot believe I did this shit on a ‘school night.’” But the next day I wake up and realize it was all VERY worth it. I met a ton of people and had a great great time!! The next morning was a little funny when I arrive at work as some of the old ladies ask me if my contacts were bothering me since I had my glasses on. I am like, “yeah, I think I ripped one this morning.” Hehehe. Iam bad! I sooo cannot be doing these late nights like this.

Another little story about being pleasantly surprised here. So get this shit. I am being 100% honest in saying I have never been hit on. Let alone in broad daylight, right. Well, I was up in Minneapolis for the Final Macy’s Happy Hour last Friday night (will have to write about that too) and I hung out Saturday for a while with Ben, his friend Colleen, and then I met up with Laura and Hillary, before I decided I should head back. So I head back and I stop in St. Peter to get some gas at the Holiday Station. I pull up and this guy about my height walked up to me as I step out and asks me how I like my Land Rover. I figured this would be a very short conversation. No…we talked for like 10 minutes. It was about the car, then he was asking about what I did and I where I live and what I did prior to moving and all kinds of stuff. At this point, I am like, WTF is going on and I am kind of flabbergasted. I just could not believe this was happening as this guy was CUTE!! About my age, tall, blond, blue. Oh he was yummy! THEN…Then, right before we finish our conversation and he walks off, he asks me for my phone number. Now I am completely floored!!!! I mean seriously, this shit didn’t happen in Minneapolis, but a hot guy is actually asking me for my phone number at the gas station in St. Peter?? WTF is that all about. When I drive off I am giddy as all hell, but realize I didn’t get his number and for the like of my, I cannot remember his fucking name! Here it is Thursday night and he has yet to call. We’ll see if he does. I guess I am not gonna get my hopes up, but it was sure fun while it lasted!! ;-)

Monday, April 7, 2008

The “People’s Department”

After my blog posting last night about not coming out at work, I get to work this morning and receive the below, very pleasing, email from my new employer. I thought it was very nice and thought I might share…

From: The Office of the Secretary
Sent: Friday, April 04, 2008 5:55 PM
To: ALL-[Omitted for blog]
Subject: The Secretary's Civil Rights Policy Statement

UNITED STATES DEPARTMENT OF [omitted for blog]
OFFICE OF THE SECRETARY
WASHINGTON, D.C. 20250

Civil Rights Policy Statement

As Secretary of [omitted for blog], I fully support the Department of [omitted for blog]’s civil rights, equal employment opportunity, and diversity policies. I am firmly committed to ensuring that we treat each other and all of [omitted for blog]'s customers with respect, dignity, and equality. This is my commitment, and I expect all [omitted for blog] employees to do their part in translating this commitment into meaningful action.

To help us achieve our mission and live up to the high standard of being known as the "People's Department," we must work together. I take responsibility for leading the way, and my policy is simple and explicit - zero tolerance of any unlawful discrimination, harassment, or reprisal. All [omitted for blog] employees, applicants, customers, and stakeholders must and will have equal access to the opportunities, programs, and services offered by this great Department.

I expect our executives, managers, and supervisors to lead by example and to effectively embrace, manage, and leverage diversity within the Agency. Recognizing that our employees are our greatest asset, we must strive to reflect the diversity of American society at all levels, and cultivate an inclusive workplace environment where the uniqueness, background, and experience of every employee is appreciated and valued.

[Name Omitted for blog]
Secretary

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Who I am, not what I am

It’s been three weeks since I started my new job. This job really is going to be great. I am already feeling that it is so much more fulfilling. Instead of sarcastically helping people in the sense of providing that momentary high, or remorse, from them buying something they really enjoy at Macy’s, I am actually truly doing something good.

As much as my friends might give me shit for moving to Mankato to work with farmers, it is becoming much much clearer as to why I was fortunate enough for this opportunity to cross my path. With every passing day things get better here in Mankato. I have a lot to learn in the job, but I am meeting new people and it is nice to be so close to home where I can just go home and help on the farm at almost a moments notice. I will obviously always miss my friends who live in Minneapolis, but being in this community is starting to feel more like home. I mean, I grew up here. At one point recently, I had to ask myself, “What was I doing in the city anyway? This fits me better anyway. Was it that I just felt more comfortable there because of what I am?”

That leads me to another point. So, I do not plan on telling anyone I currently work with that I am gay. Instead, I plan on living my life outside of work as I would normally, but never saying anything at work. I feel like this way, my co-workers will get to know me for WHO I am instead of WHAT I am. I am not saying that they will have a problem with it, but I do know that there is a higher percentage of people here who are much more close-minded and I am not going to give anyone ammunition for disliking me just because they don’t agree with who I might be outside of work. I figure down the road if I get found out, then they will truly know me for WHO I am rather than WHAT they perceive I may have been previous to truly getting to know the real me. Good idea or bad? I donno, but that is the way it will be.